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Question: So I love sex like really love sex lol.

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It is one of my favorite things to talk about. I am all about learning new things and the one thing that I feel that I struggle with is riding. Could you give any stretching tips and just general tips on how to ride?

I want to take souls lol. Answer: Hello love, Thank you so much for your question. We definitely understand the physical aspect of riding, how it requires stamina, energy, muscle control, and how empowering it can be. From being in control, managing the stroke, to taking souls, riding has many benefits for the rider and the ridee. One great piece of advice we were once given was that riding is a chance to practice confidence.

If you embody the powerful, erotic being within you, it increases the likelihood of creating a pleasurable sexual experience.

Here are a few recommendations to enhance your riding skills and experience. As comes to an end, we can all agree that we could all use a little more pleasure.

This holiday season get your loved ones or yourself the present of pleasure by using our curated guide of Black owned and sex positive brands and products. Question: One of my biggest barriers has been being afraid of intimacy and sex because of Christian religious beliefs. Do you have any tips for how can I begin to explore sex and relationships after years of religious sexual shame?

Answer: Hello love, Thank you for reaching out.

This is such an important and unfortunately common question. Many of us find ourselves confronting deep rooted sexual shame as we explore and grow in our sexual journey and build loving and healthy relationships with ourselves and others.

Many of our stories include instances of our hands being slapped for exploring our bodies when we were young, being taught that abstinence was the best sexual choice instead of one sexual choice, or watching others be judged and shamed for their sexual desires. Living in a sex negative culture means that sexual shame is normalized and constantly reinforced.

Answer: Hi love, this is such a real and important conundrum that we have to navigate, so thank you for sharing your question. When European colonizers first came into contact with African people, they saw people who were comfortable with nudity and who knew how to dance with their entire body. These stereotypes of the Black body and Black sexual expression being immoral, hypersexual, and a form of deviance have followed us ever since.

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Question: Hi! I've never tried anal sex. I just want to know if the anus is an erogenous zone for women? Answer: Hi love, Thank you for asking! Anal play rimming, fingering, penetration can be pleasurable for anyone! First thing to remember is that anal play does not have to include any penetration. Rimming, for example, is the act of using the mouth, lips, tongue on the rim anal opening. This is also known as analingus.

Some people also receive pleasure from simply rubbing with a finger or licking without any penetration. There are many nerve endings at the entrance of the anus very much similar to the entrance of the vagina which provide sources of pleasure. Question: For the past year on and off, I have been quick on the draw intimately with my wife and was wondering what can I do to change that? Answer: Hi love, Thank you for your question. This is such a common question for people with a penis. Statistics show that about 1 in 3 men experience pre-ejaculation PE.

Are there health detriments to that, or am I just being extra germaphobic?

Answer : This is such a good question! There are a lot of people who question if kissing after oral sex is hygienic and taboo. Some people think it is intimate or erotic and some find it to be unpleasant. So, there are many things to reflect on regarding your no-kissing preference.

Question: Hey Dalychia and Rafaella, Thank you again for your work and what you are providing to the black community. I am so very grateful and wish you both so many blessings in your personal lives. Not sure how much knowledge you have surrounding the topic, but it seems that I again hold racial trauma in my vulva which causes my vagina to be tense and cause painful penetration.

I've considered dilation kits, cbd lube, maybe even seeing a sex therapist. As I've started dating again, your " circle of pleasure " instagram post has released my worry about not feeling complete if I can't have penetrative sex because pleasure in all forms can be enjoyable.

But I just wanted to have a dialogue about any advice around alleviating painful intercourse. Also, do you have any suggestions for natural lube? There seems to be controversy around using coconut oil internally, or even aloe vera. Answer: We appreciate you following up and for the blessings! We're glad that you've been able to put a name to your experience. With new information comes new ways to engage in addressing it.

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Many people with vaginismus have experienced some form of trauma in their lives. And as we know, trauma has a huge impact on our entire beings, from our physical health to our mental and emotional well-being. We mention this simply to highlight the complex nature of trauma and its treatment. Question: Greetings from a small island in the Caribbean. I was just wondering if you guys have any tips on achieving a female orgasm and 'cumming'.

Also some clarification on what those terms mean and what squirting is. Answer: Thanks for reaching out.

We are always excited to hear from people who live across the globe! Let's start with defining some terms:. Orgasm: The climax of sexual excitement.

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Physical pleasure centers the genitals and for some people, throughout their entire body. Female Ejaculation Cumming : The release of thick and whitish fluid from the female prostate, also referred to as the G-spot. Squirting : The release of a diluted fluid urine and prostate fluid from the urinary bladder. Question: I want to first say how much I love Afrosexology and everything it represents. Okay, so I'm a virgin and somedays I feel embarrassed about it. I'm a virgin by choice because I want my sexual firsts to be with someone that genuinely cares about me and vice versa.

That sounds good in theory but I get discouraged because I feel that no one wants to date a virgin. Especially guys who are my age I've also never had a boyfriend I wasn't allowed to have one in high school and boys rarely pursue me romantically in college.

The love below: one black woman’s view on anal sex

I graduate in the fall and I'm scared sexually to be a virgin in the real world. Question: Hey hey!

As a married woman, age almost 35, with an active sex drive and a husband of the same age with not as much drive Answer: Hey love! This is such a great question. First, I'm wondering if there has been a change in your husband's sex drive or if he's always had a lower drive than yours.

First off, you guys are amazing!! Thanks so much for creating a space for black folk to celebrate our sexuality, on our own terms. I saw your post on twitter inviting a discussion on consent. I wanted to reach out because I've been struggling to draw the line between consent and non-consent specifically in light of the recent Aziz Ansari situation.

I'm seeking some clarity.